How can/should I counsel suffering people? Is the point of counseling to remove all suffering? Why or why not?
Three reasons suggest that the point of counseling is not to remove all suffering. First, suffering has the benefit of promoting growth (James 1:2-4). In fact, John Ortberg (2002) suggests that one of the most important factors in spiritual formation is suffering (p. 211). Second, challenges move individuals to reach out to God for comfort, thus removing all suffering would actually risk a counselee missing the voice of God. C. S. Lewis (1996) insightfully supports the assertion by concluding that pain is God’s “megaphone to rouse a deaf world” (p. 83). Finally, God has determined suffering as necessary; otherwise, it would not exist. Accordingly, it seems unreasonable for a counselor to attempt to remove all suffering. Henri J. M. Nouwen (1975) astutely claims, “It would be just another illusion to believe that reaching out to God will free us from pain and suffering” (p. 150).
Although suffering is necessary, unnecessary suffering, which is suffering that does not draw us closer to God, is not necessary. Accordingly, the counselor can effectively counsel suffering people by helping counselees’ explore the benefits of sufferings, discover a grace-based theodicy, and experience suffering with the counselee. Perhaps most importantly, is the fellowship of human suffering with the counselee just as Christ, who became flesh, fellowshipped with humanity’s sufferings even unto death (2 Corinthians 1:7; Philippians 3:10).
References
Lewis, C. S. (1996). The problem of pain. New York, NY: Touchstone.
Nouwen, H. J. M. (1975). Reaching out: The three movements of the spiritual life. New York: Doubleday.
Ortberg, J. (2002). The life you’ve always wanted: Spiritual disciplines for ordinary people. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan.
